I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
