normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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