we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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