Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
