Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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