physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
