Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
