I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
