Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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