i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
