You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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