fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Randomize
