"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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