after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
