Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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