Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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