I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
