so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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