I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So much rum. So many feels.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
