Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize