How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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