the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
