I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
