I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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