What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
