Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
