so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize