The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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