I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I have aggressive nipples.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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