he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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