We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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