Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
