i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
