I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Randomize
