We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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