am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
