That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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