it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize