your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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