And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize