if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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