seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize