Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
