that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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