It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Randomize
