That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Randomize
