I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
