Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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