I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
