im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
